Haen an Puso / Where is the Heart by Celle Gonzales Calomos



Dae mo ako haputon ngonyan
Kun haen an puso ko.
Dae mo ako hilingon na garo pinipirit
Na simbagon taka. Haen mananggad?
Kadto yaon duman sa pinakamalaad
Na bituon kun maaaga, nagtatago,
Nakikikawat sa iba pang bituon
Sa kalangitan; minsan nakikihapagan
Sa maliwanagon na bulan na bilog
Ogmang nakikipariyahan digdi na ulay mo
Siya maeenotan sa paghanap saimo ,
Sa lugar sa langit na dae kayang maabot kan isip.
An puso na ini napagal na, huminale sa bituon,
Naghanap paiplian sa diklom, naging anino,
Maisog ta dae man siya nahihiling, ogmang hinihigop
Kan anino mo. Paano madudulagan an sarong
Anino na dawa nagririkurida, pirming nakasunod ,
Nakabantay, nakaturuhok, nakamasid?
May beses na nagdudungaw an langit
Naghahanap sa puso na huminale sa bituon.
Dae na.
Dae na makukua ta kugos na kan anino na
Hanap kan puso . Dae nungka makakabutas pa.
Ngonyan mahapot ka pa kun haen an puso ko?

March 6, 2015
8:00 pm


Editor’s Note:This piece is just so expressive and too emotional. While we do not vouch we made the perfect translation, there is the open and close opinion that correct translation and interpretation relies only on the reader first. We translate so readers who are not familiar with the Bicol language can at least appreciate homegrown poets are as prolific and comparable to English writers as to the depth and meaning of their work. But reading the poem and dropping a comment to check our translation is welcome. We can even incorporate the suggestion on the lines below. So, here it is:

Where is the Heart

Don’t (Do not) ask me now / Where my heart is / Don’t look at me (Don’t stare at me) as if insisting (or, force or intimidate) / To answer you. Where was it really? /

Before it was in the brightest / Star at break of dawn, hiding, / Playing with other stars / In the sky; sometimes cavorting / With the bright full moon (The bright moon in full) /

Happy (Happily) racing here as if / It will be left behind (or, Someone will be first) in search of you / In a place in the sky not even the thought (mind) may (can) fathom /

This really tired heart, (that) departed from the star, / Searched for a cover in the dark, transformed into a shadow / Fearless for it can (may) not be seen, (feeling) happy(ily) (being) engulfed or happiness being engulfed /

By your shadow. (How to break free from one (or, How can I break free from one) / Shadow while (even if) constantly roaming, yet always (following) behind / Guarding, intently staring, observing? /

(There are) When times sky (heaven) peeks out (outward) / Searching for the heart that left (deserted) the star /

No more (Or, There is none) / No chance to get back (to reclaim) for it is under the embrace of the shadow / That the heart seeks (long for). Not anymore can it be free. / Now you will ask where is my heart? /

Celle Gonzales Calomos
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